Ephesians 3:1-13 Disappointed.

Sometimes as a child of God I just have to blindly obey.
And most of the time, the outcome doesn't go my way.
And God hears about it. I make sure of it.

It's not that I don't know he's good.
I'm just disappointed because sometimes I feel let down.
I know that's only from my limited perspective and mood.
And he has been around the block and knows what he's doing.

But I guess that's why I'm human.

Abraham was told that he would be a blessing to the nations.
But he died far short of that vision that God gave him when he spoke of the sky and the sea shore.
Abraham was undoubtedly the father of faith,but I also feel he would have died just a little disappointed.

When Paul says " Surely you have heard about the administration of God’s grace that was given to me" he was talking about God asking him to invite the Gentiles into the kingdom of God Helping them : "understand his insight into the mystery of Christ" . And though Christ died to make it possible, Paul made it happen. Abraham's faith was justified by Christ, but the promise was in part fulfilled by Paul. Paul proclaimed to the nations the blessing they received from God through Christ, that was promised to Abraham.

It strikes me how faithful God is. 
In spite of Paul's nature before his conversion God used him to save many, God used Paul to keep a promise to a man who had long before died. What a faithful God. 

The humility of Paul.
^Ephesians3:7 I became a servant of this gospel by the gift of God’s grace given me through the working of his power. ⁸ Although I am less than the least of all the Lord’s people, this grace was given me: to preach to the Gentiles the boundless riches of Christ, ⁹ and to make plain to everyone the administration of this mystery, which for ages past was kept hidden in God, who created all things. 

Paul considered himself a servant of the gospel. But he didn't see servant hood as a negative thing. on the contrary. He saw his ability to do this work as a demonstration of God's grace through the working of his mighty power in his own life. In other words, he saw everything he did as the work of God in his life. And he couldn't be more happy than to be a slave to God. 

Paul's reckless abandon attitude scares me. I have trusted God precious few times, and those times never turned out as I expected. often I felt worse for wear, but came out stronger. I suppose the same was true for Paul. But I could never give him the reigns completely it's too scary.

Part of me thinks i'm faking it. Part of me doubts it's real. Part of me thinks that if I trust him and put myself out there, things will fall through and he wont catch me. And part of me deep down is more afraid that he will, because if he catches me. Then it's over! I have to trust him, I have to say no to myself and my logic, and say yes to God. That part of me doesn't want to let go.

What God intended.
^{Ephesians3:10} His intent was that now, through the church, the manifold wisdom of God should be made known to the rulers and authorities in the heavenly realms, ¹¹ according to his eternal purpose that he accomplished in Christ Jesus our Lord. ¹² In him and through faith in him we may approach God with freedom and confidence.

God intends not only for us to declare the authority of Christ and the wisdom of God to people, but also to the authorities in the heavenly realm.This was part of His purpose and plan from the very beginning in sending Christ. It almost seems like God was proving a point through the church. And the point he was proving is this. That all who believe in Him may approach him in freedom and confidence.

In other words. These are my children and they belong to me. Come between me and them and you'll see what happens.

It's amazing the privileges we have as sons and daughters of God. But why don't we use it?

I resolve to...
Trust that he knows best.
Be a little more reverent when i talk to the creator of the universe.
Prayerfully submit to him, and remember if I trust him, really trust and believe that he is good,
Then I will obey him, regardless of the outcome.
Exploit the privileges I have as a son of God.